So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
