Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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