I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
