I am puke
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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