I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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