Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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