Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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