i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
