Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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