I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
