According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
