on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
