Don't you send me to vm
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
