my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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