i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
