she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
