Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
What a dumb baby whore.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Randomize
