Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
