worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
