Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
