My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
