New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
