The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
