so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
