Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We need to feng shui this bitch.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
