The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
We are two peas in an std pod
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
