I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
