but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
