The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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