You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
you had me at cake vodka
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
