So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
