dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
