She said her name was "party"
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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