All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I am naked and annoyed.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
