Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
