Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
