So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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