somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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