you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
