doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
