You're my little dorito
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
