is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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