Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'm always down for nudity.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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