You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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