the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
