i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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