Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize