And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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