Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Welp...herpes.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
