I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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