He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
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